Ask yourself if your feelings are really focused on this specific person. Can picture yourself together as a couple, and do you only see yourself being with them?
Ask yourself if you just enjoy their company or want a deeper emotional connection. If you want a deeper connection, is that feeling constant or does it come and go? If you find them physically attractive, figure out if it’s subjective or objective. Do you think that they’re good looking? Do you actually want to be physically intimate with them? Or is it more general, like “I can see why someone would think they’re hot. ”
You could also reach out to a parent or sibling for advice.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, try to clear your mind and reflect on your emotions. Imagine that your feelings are like a pie. As you slice into it, think of each slice as a distinct emotion and identify it. When in doubt, trust your gut. If one person dramatically affects your mood and emotions more than your other close friends, there’s a good chance you have romantic feelings for them. View the attraction in the context of your life. Are you going through a rough patch or separation with a current partner? This makes you more vulnerable to emotional swings and changing feelings than normal.
When you’re at a party or group gathering together, do you try to ditch the others so you can be alone with your friend?
If you get really nervous just thinking about it, you probably have deeper feelings. Think about how telling them would affect your friendship. Even if you do have romantic feelings for them, ask yourself if your friendship is more important than getting those feelings off of your chest. Examine if you have any indication that the other person feels the way you do. If not, consider how their knowing you do will change the friendship.
Weigh the pros and cons, and try to decide if dating them would justify risking your friendship. Even if you have romantic feelings for them, you might want to move on if you think dating them wouldn’t be as fulfilling as your connection as friends. On the other hand, if you visualize dating them and it blows your connection as friends out of the water, a deep, long-term romantic relationship might be worth the risk.
It’s normal to feel physically attracted to someone without having romantic feelings for them. When imagining physical intimacy, try to decide whether you just think your friend is hot or if a physical act would involve a deeper emotional connection. [9] X Research source
You can’t predict the future, but try to be honest with yourself and your emotions. If you don’t think you could handle being friends with someone after a breakup, ask yourself if it’s more important to act on your feelings or to preserve an important friendship.
