Pursue your own hobbies and interests. Depending on your interests, you could join a writing group, book club, bowling league (or similar adult sports league), gym, photography club, or cooking class. Getting involved in activities you can enjoy will help you meet people with similar interests. Get involved with your child’s school by joining the PTA or becoming a chaperone on field trips. This can be a great way to meet other parents. Go to a house of worship. If you believe in a certain religion, start attending a church, synagogue, mosque, etc. If you already go to church, get involved with any religious study groups, volunteer activities, or social events the church sets up.
This option works especially well for extroverts who don’t mind large group settings. Organizations like this usually arrange a variety of activities, from cocktail mixtures to ski trips. If you don’t know where to start looking, head online and check out daily deal services (Groupon, LivingSocial) or socializing services (Meetup. com).
A blind “friend date” may or may not be successful, but in each instance, you’ll never know unless you try.
If you do not have a dog, volunteer to walk dogs from an animal shelter or rescue group.
Going up to strangers is one of the most difficult ways to meet new people and can be difficult if you are shy or have difficulty starting random conversations. [5] X Research source
For example, head to a local coffee shop every Saturday at 11 AM or a low-key pub every Thursday evening at 7 PM. Repeat the process for several weeks to several months.
Crossing your arms and/or legs and looking down make you less approachable and like you do not want to be bothered.
For example, you might meet a neighbor 20 years older than you who happens to share your love for cooking and gardening, or you could make friends with someone 20 years younger than you who frequents the same museums and coffee shops.
If you can answer yes to these questions, the person is likely open to building a friendship. If the answer is no, maybe this person is not open to building a friendship at this point.
Pay attention to the person when you interact with them. You will make more friends by showing that you are interested in the person than trying to make the person be interested in you. [12] X Trustworthy Source HelpGuide Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source This might reassure your acquaintance that you would be open to an invitation if one is extended to you.
Spending one-on-one time is key to building the friendship. You can simply say, “Hey, what are you doing on Saturday? Do you want to try out this new restaurant?” Making informal invitations is a good way to determine if someone is interested in becoming friends, but it won’t actually be enough to make someone your friend. You’ll need to take the extra step and actually invite them out. Accept invitations as well. You might be hesitant to accept it depending on the circumstances, but unless you have a good reason not to—like a prior commitment or a moral objection to the activity being suggested—it’s better to take the risk than to pass the opportunity by. Spending time with an acquaintance can be a good way to help your relationship grow into an actual friendship, even if the activity planned for the day usually isn’t something you’d plan for yourself. If you’ve been invited to a group event—a birthday party, a company picnic, drinks after work—you may even find yourself meeting and befriending someone there other than the person who invited you.
There’s no shame in telling someone, “We have a lot in common; let’s try to be friends. " The key is to phrase your desire as something mutually beneficial so that you don’t come across as being needy or awkward. The former statement sounds much better than, “Would you please be my friend?”
Start talking about your values. You don’t need to reject someone whose perspective is different from yours, but it’s often easier to connect with people who share your values and convictions. This may mean turning some people off, but it’ll ultimately allow you to build deeper connections. Get personal. Tell people about yourself. Explain what motivated you to pursue your current career path or describe the sorts of activities you do in your free time. Ask your acquaintances more about their lives, as well. You should be honest with yourself throughout the process, too. Don’t force yourself to spend hours on a topic your acquaintance loves even though you have no interest in it.
A person may be too busy to hang out or have prior commitments. If someone does reject you, it is not because something is wrong with you. Maybe the two of you were not a good fit. Be proud of yourself for trying to make friends and try to learn something from the experience. Keep trying to befriend the same acquaintance. [17] X Research source Try to make plans with someone a couple of times before giving up. . The only time you should give up sooner is if you’re given a clear indication that your goodwill isn’t wanted. Keep trying to make friends with other people. Even if one person rejects your friendship completely, that doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you. After you’ve given up on one person, continue trying to make friends out of your other acquaintances.
There will be times when you look silly, are embarrassed, or feel awkward. Some interactions will go really well and others will not. All of that is perfectly fine, and it is not a big deal. [18] X Research source
Social media websites offer the greatest benefit when they keep you more connected to your friends. If your social media accounts only give you an excuse to avoid real, meaningful contact with people, they’re doing more harm than good.
You may have different friends to meet different needs in your life. Some friends are for regular happy hour or lunches, while you may go hiking with another friend. Working on a couple of close friendships or gathering a huge circle of casual friends are both options. Do whatever makes you happy.
Some of your new friendships may start out great and then burn out. This is completely normal. Try to schedule regular times to meet with your friends. If both of you are able to meet each Friday for an hour, go for it. For friends who are a bit busier, set aside at least one regular time to meet each month, like each second Sunday afternoon or every third Thursday evening.
