You don’t have to walk around wearing a grin all the time because that would be unnatural. Just practice keeping an open, pleasant expression on your face most of the time. You also don’t have to wait for others to initiate a smile. Don’t be afraid to make brief eye contact with people and to show your warmth.

Have some things to talk about down pat, like the weather, a class you’re both taking, sports, or other “safe” topics. That way, you can gauge their interest before moving into deeper conversation. For example, you might say something like “Hey, what did you think of that homework assignment last night?” Or, “This weather has been great. I love fall, don’t you?”

For instance, you could say to your neighbor in class, “I love your pencil case. Where did you get it?”

For instance, you could ask a classmate, “What kind of books do you like to read?” or “Do you have any brothers or sisters?”

Joining an extracurricular activity like a sports team or drama club will give you lots of opportunities to practice talking to people. [5] X Expert Source Alicia OglesbyProfessional School Counselor Expert Interview. 29 October 2020. If you feel comfortable, ask your family or friends to practice with you. Pretend that they’re strangers, then strike up a conversation and try to keep it going. The more you practice, the less nervous you’ll be to talk.

If you’re struggling to think of traits, ask family members, friends, or loved ones to help. You might be surprised at the positive way they see you.

Hobbies can also give you a reason to get involved in clubs or groups, which is a good way to meet new friends. [8] X Expert Source Alicia OglesbyProfessional School Counselor Expert Interview. 29 October 2020. Another way to develop hobbies and meet similar people is to start groups. Do you like chess, for example, but there isn’t a place to play at school? Maybe you could start a chess club at lunch. [9] X Expert Source Alicia OglesbyProfessional School Counselor Expert Interview. 29 October 2020.

Being yourself doesn’t mean refusing to work on your negative traits. It just means owning and appreciating what makes you unique. It also means that you don’t need to compare yourself with others. Try to catch yourself if you notice that you’re trying to emulate other people.

For instance, before you introduce yourself to someone, tell yourself, “I bet this person is friendly,” instead of, “I’m always awkward when I introduce myself to someone new. ” Visualization helps you practice navigating different social scenarios before you actually encounter them.

For example, if someone isn’t open to talking to you, they might just be busy or worried about their home life. They could even be feeling shy, too. If you find yourself stewing over a rejection, make yourself think about a positive encounter you had instead.

Do your best to cheer up friends who’re feeling down. At the same time, though, don’t feel you need to give them advice unless they ask for it. Sometimes, people just want to be heard. Many shy people are great listeners, so if you have this skill, make the most of it.

You don’t have to act fake or be happy all the time, but a positive mindset will help you attract and keep more friends. Encourage people around you, too! Being positive means celebrating others’ hard work, dreams, and accomplishments.

For instance, don’t start talking about your deepest personal issues if you’ve only known someone for a week or two. If you’re not sure how much to talk to your friends, try to mirror their level of involvement in the relationship. For instance, if they text you every day, it’s probably okay for you to text them every day, too.